one of my favorite things is when you give a baby your finger and they hold on to it as tight as they can. it’s funny because they don’t even come close to having the amount of muscle power i do. do you really think you can hold me here haha. i’ll crush you

(via ann-oyingmuch)




once when i was little, i claimed it was a teacher’s work day so i wouldn’t have to go to school and mom’s not an idiot so of course it didn’t work, but when we got to the school, we found it was a teacher’s work day and that made me think i had super powers so i started trying to kill classmates with my mind to confirm the theory

You thought you had super powers so you immediately attempted to murder everyone

go big or go home

(via igavelifelemons)


do you ever see a person you used to be friends with and you’re like “glad i got the fuck outta that one”

(Source: hitchups, via st-farts)

17 Aug 14 at 12 pm


this baby is gonna have one hell of a story to tell when he’s older

17 Aug 14 at 12 pm

Johnny Depp photographed by Bruce Weber for Interview magazine

(Source: deppslove, via dreamofdepp)

Johnny Depp photographed by Bruce Weber for Interview magazine
17 Aug 14 at 12 pm


How did they (Disney) deal with your performance? 
They were most definitely upset.
But you must have been confident then that you were doing it right. 
Oh I did. I mean, I didn’t do anything differently.

Johnny Depp on how Captain Jack Sparrow almost never was. 

(via dreamofdepp)


did anyone ever tell the Backstreet Boys why

(via emorainbowcloud)

17 Aug 14 at 12 am



A swarm of anchovies

the smelly smell that smells…smelly.

(Source: sizvideos, via igavelifelemons)



if you follow me on tumblr and like my posts a lot i probably have fondly memorized your username and consider you a pal

(Source: foodstain, via igavelifelemons)

17 Aug 14 at 12 am


"Puny god."

All I can think of is in the second one Tom said he had a rope tied to his leg.  He told the crew to pull it during his speech so it would look like he was grabbed.  He didn’t know when it was happening so he wouldn’t anticipate it and well there you go - standing delivering a speech on how grand he is and - WHOOP there he goes….

(Source: lokihiddleston, via safety-officer-barto)